Thursday, October 21, 2010

Disturbing

Last night the Hoos came down from putting LP to bed and was very disturbed.

As they lay in bed, LP said to him, "I don't like myself. I'm not skinny enough."

He was dumbfounded.

"[AK]'s is skinny. And you're skinny. And mommy's skinny. I'm not skinny."

WHERE DOES A FOUR YEAR OLD LEARN THIS?!

This is not something we would ever say. We wouldn't use the word "skinny" to describe anyone. We call AK 'peanut' but we don't say that in relation to LP!

We are pretty sure that she didn't actually mean that she didn't like herself - that was said for effect. But the fact that she even knows the concept (although hopefully doesn't understand) of weight impacting a girl's self-confidence is shocking.

I know I can't protect her forever, but I thought I could protect her from this.

I know she didn't hear it from me or the Hoos. And I know she didn't hear it from a teacher (her teacher was quite stunned when I relayed the story this am). We don't watch any of the tweener shows on TV (Umizoomi and Sesame Street are not exactly worrisome). Maybe from a friend? But I know most of her friends - and their parents - and I don't see any of them saying anything like this either.

For now we (me, the Hoos, her teachers) are going to listen closely and focus on building confidence and reinforcing positives.

1 comment:

Billie said...

It must be osmosis or something. Kylie started being obsessed with her looks at about that age too and would start asking if was cute or not.

Piero is definitely obsessed with being fat and calls everyone fat but me who actually is fat (yes... I fit in the obese range according to the BMI charts). I find that omission rather interesting which makes me wonder if he is sensitive to the fact that it might hurt my feelings.