This morning in his rush to get the girls out of the house, the Hoos forgot to change LP out of her pajama shirt. He didn't notice until they walked into the day care. When he started to laugh, LP looked at him quizzically and asked why he was laughing. He tried to downplay it so she wouldn't notice, but, as you may have guessed, LP is a pretty smart kid*. She looked down and figured out the joke.
"No worries," the Hoos told her, "I am sure you have an extra shirt in your bin." Except apparently she didn't.
When he called to recount the story to me, the Hoos added, "So, you should probably check that out. There aren't any shorts either, just long pants and a shirt that looks like it would fit AK." He is right, there aren't many clothes in the bin. A few weeks ago when LP got some water on her shorts she insisted on changing. She ended up wearing size 18 month pants. They were more like hot pants.
HOWEVER, I interrupted him. "Okay, so take note of that and bring more clothes next week." He started sputtering, "But that is why I am telling you. Because really only one of us should be responsible for that, you know so we don't get confused."
"Excellent!" I responded, "We have talked it out and we are straight, you will take care of LP's bin. I don't have to be in charge of everything."
Wanna bet who ends up sending in new clothes next week.
*Case in point: Last night, post-tantrum, LP and AK and I were watching Animal Planet. There was a big cat on the screen and I asked LP if it was a leopard or a cheetah (as the Hoos will tell you I can't keep any of the big cats beyond a tiger and a lion straight). She told me that it was a cheetah and two seconds later the narrator confirmed. She then went on to tell me that the gazelles they were hunting"...look like deer! No goats! No, I know! They are cantaloupes!"
When the cheetah finally caught the "cantaloupe" she said, "Mommy! The cheetah is killing the cantaloupe! What should we do?" I responded that it was important because the cheetah was hungry and the gazelle was its dinner. "We don't eat cantaloupes! We don't eat animals!" I started to explain about how chickens, etc. were animals, but I just figured it was better to smile and laugh. I like cantaloupe, anyway.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
An Embarassment of Riches
Today after work I had an optometrist appointment to get my contact lense prescription updated. This meant that I got to day care later than usual - around 6 instead of 5:15.
I got the girls and we immediately went to the playground. Which was fine for about 10 minutes. And then LP started to have a tantrum. "I'm still hungry!" after many many pieces of Pirate Booty and "I don't want to go!" after standing on the side and eating or yelling and not doing any playing.
She then proceeded to lay down and cry. It was awesome.
One of LP's friends kept trying to cheer her up, "Come and play, LP!" and gave solid advice, "You shouldn't lay down, your hair will get dirty. When I cry I stand up and walk around."
At a few points AK also chimed in for a symphony of whining. I felt like such a rockstar mom.
I am not much of a yeller, instead choosing to talk quietly, asking why she was acting like this and what she actually wanted (not that I thought she actually knew). When I eventually got LP into the car she chided me, "I had a bad day because you were running late."
The Hoos just called to tell me he has a flat tire. Looks like tonight is just getting better.
I got the girls and we immediately went to the playground. Which was fine for about 10 minutes. And then LP started to have a tantrum. "I'm still hungry!" after many many pieces of Pirate Booty and "I don't want to go!" after standing on the side and eating or yelling and not doing any playing.
She then proceeded to lay down and cry. It was awesome.
One of LP's friends kept trying to cheer her up, "Come and play, LP!" and gave solid advice, "You shouldn't lay down, your hair will get dirty. When I cry I stand up and walk around."
At a few points AK also chimed in for a symphony of whining. I felt like such a rockstar mom.
I am not much of a yeller, instead choosing to talk quietly, asking why she was acting like this and what she actually wanted (not that I thought she actually knew). When I eventually got LP into the car she chided me, "I had a bad day because you were running late."
The Hoos just called to tell me he has a flat tire. Looks like tonight is just getting better.
Teaching Tact
Saturday night we went on a family date. My little family of four went over to the home of another little family of four for pizza and make your own sundaes. Our kids are exactly the same age and for the most part get along splendidly. In fact, I think the littlest buggers - AK and WMK - are in love, although AK is coy about it, because she smiled but didn't kiss back when her boyfriend smooched her.
Anyway, Chlo-Chlo is all about princesses and dress up. LP was in heaven. Within a minute of us entering their pristine home, both girls had stripped down to their skivvies and were pulling costumes out of the playroom with great fanfare. Apparently, both chose ballet outfits for the first act.
LP walks out with a huge smile in a tutued leotard on backwards. The low cut v that was supposed to be in the back? Was in the front practically exposing her ninnies and navel. She was like the toddler J. Lo. Very fashion forward.
Lesson 400, "Now that you know how to dress yourself, make sure you do it right." Crucial because the Hoos couldn't tell that the leotard was backwards and would have dressed LP that way himself!
Being visually tacky is only one half of the equation. LP is also very direct, like most toddlers.
Yesterday as we took a family walk she announced, "Jules has a birthmark. It will go away when she gets big." Jules is the little sister of a boy in the older class at preschool. That is, he is not even in LP's class. Apparently Jules came in to drop off her big brother and LP got all inquisitive and in-your-face asking questions. Cute for a three-year old, but exponentially less cute as she gets older.
I guess it is time to start the "asking appropriate questions" and "keeping things to yourself" training. Mommy could probably use some help in those areas as well.
Anyway, Chlo-Chlo is all about princesses and dress up. LP was in heaven. Within a minute of us entering their pristine home, both girls had stripped down to their skivvies and were pulling costumes out of the playroom with great fanfare. Apparently, both chose ballet outfits for the first act.
LP walks out with a huge smile in a tutued leotard on backwards. The low cut v that was supposed to be in the back? Was in the front practically exposing her ninnies and navel. She was like the toddler J. Lo. Very fashion forward.
Lesson 400, "Now that you know how to dress yourself, make sure you do it right." Crucial because the Hoos couldn't tell that the leotard was backwards and would have dressed LP that way himself!
Being visually tacky is only one half of the equation. LP is also very direct, like most toddlers.
Yesterday as we took a family walk she announced, "Jules has a birthmark. It will go away when she gets big." Jules is the little sister of a boy in the older class at preschool. That is, he is not even in LP's class. Apparently Jules came in to drop off her big brother and LP got all inquisitive and in-your-face asking questions. Cute for a three-year old, but exponentially less cute as she gets older.
I guess it is time to start the "asking appropriate questions" and "keeping things to yourself" training. Mommy could probably use some help in those areas as well.
Monday, August 24, 2009
A New Thing (But Not Necessarily MY Thing)
You know how when you do sometihng once and all of a sudden it becomes "your thing." Even though it was something you only did once and it isn't necessarily your thing?
After hearing a news story on the radio, I decided to DVR (this is a verb, not sure if that is appropriate or common, but it is) a new show, "The Mighty Boosh." A British comedy, I knew it could either be really funny or really awful. Coupled with the fact that the Hoos and I often have a horrible time with heavy accents (we had to turn off Gosford Park after five minutes because neither of us could understand a WORD being said), there was a potent potential for disaster.
On Monday night at 9:30 after getting the girls to bed, I knew I wasn't up for an hour-long show and I thought The Mighty Boosh might be a good way to pass a half hour. Bizarre doesn't even begin to describe this show. BUT, to be honest, there is really no way to describe it. For someone who writes for a living, I feel I am at a loss to appropriately describe it. The episode we saw involved eels, a man with a life saver-like thing over his eye and a lot of urine, and a cross-dresser with a lot of money. There was also a side story about an odd collection of characters riding a magic carpet.
After watching it and laughing out loud a few times, gasping in horror and confusion a few other times, the Hoos looked at me and just gaped. I wasn't sure what to think. It took me a few days to determine that I might as well DVR the next episode.
Last night the Hoos saw a commercial for the show and called out, "Aim! Your show is on!" I am not sure if this is exactly what I would consider my show. Kind of like the time the Hoos recommended Nip/Tuck to some friends and then was horrified when the next episode aired and he realized exactly what he "had done" (made us look like pervs).
So, not that I am recommending it, but if you want to try to help me describe it, either check out The Mighty Boosh on YouTube or check it out at 1am on Mondays during Adult Swim on the Cartoon Network. Mom, don't even bother, it isn't for you.
After hearing a news story on the radio, I decided to DVR (this is a verb, not sure if that is appropriate or common, but it is) a new show, "The Mighty Boosh." A British comedy, I knew it could either be really funny or really awful. Coupled with the fact that the Hoos and I often have a horrible time with heavy accents (we had to turn off Gosford Park after five minutes because neither of us could understand a WORD being said), there was a potent potential for disaster.
On Monday night at 9:30 after getting the girls to bed, I knew I wasn't up for an hour-long show and I thought The Mighty Boosh might be a good way to pass a half hour. Bizarre doesn't even begin to describe this show. BUT, to be honest, there is really no way to describe it. For someone who writes for a living, I feel I am at a loss to appropriately describe it. The episode we saw involved eels, a man with a life saver-like thing over his eye and a lot of urine, and a cross-dresser with a lot of money. There was also a side story about an odd collection of characters riding a magic carpet.
After watching it and laughing out loud a few times, gasping in horror and confusion a few other times, the Hoos looked at me and just gaped. I wasn't sure what to think. It took me a few days to determine that I might as well DVR the next episode.
Last night the Hoos saw a commercial for the show and called out, "Aim! Your show is on!" I am not sure if this is exactly what I would consider my show. Kind of like the time the Hoos recommended Nip/Tuck to some friends and then was horrified when the next episode aired and he realized exactly what he "had done" (made us look like pervs).
So, not that I am recommending it, but if you want to try to help me describe it, either check out The Mighty Boosh on YouTube or check it out at 1am on Mondays during Adult Swim on the Cartoon Network. Mom, don't even bother, it isn't for you.
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Klepto
This morning as the Hoos, the girls and I got into the car after walking through some shops and a farmer's market, I noticed LP playing with something. "It's broken, mama," she said as she handed me a cheap, plastic Halloween themed bracelet/watch.
"Where did you get this?" I inquired. "Did you take it from that store?"
She just continued to whine that it was broken as I insisted that she and the Hoos return it to the card store we had just left. The Hoos was more intent on fixing it before returning it.
The whole experience brought me back to a day, probably more than 25 years ago, when I liberated something from TSS. TSS was short of a precursor to KMART. Maybe a hybrid of KMART and Kohls? Anyway, there was a red halter shirt with gold trim that was originally part of an outfit worn by a Kate Jackson Charlie's Angel Barbie doll. It was just sitting on the shelf in the toy section. Separated from its owner. It looked so pretty. So perfect for my own Barbie...
As soon as my mom saw it in my hand, it was over. I was marched back into the store, made to hand it to a cashier and apologize. Obviously, this stuck with me.
According to the Hoos, when LP apologized (mostly into his shoulder), the young cashier shrugged and said thanks. I hope that a lesson was learned, because I don't want to be the one marching her back in to the store. I wonder if kids realize that events like that are just as traumatic and humiliating for a parent as for a child...
"Where did you get this?" I inquired. "Did you take it from that store?"
She just continued to whine that it was broken as I insisted that she and the Hoos return it to the card store we had just left. The Hoos was more intent on fixing it before returning it.
The whole experience brought me back to a day, probably more than 25 years ago, when I liberated something from TSS. TSS was short of a precursor to KMART. Maybe a hybrid of KMART and Kohls? Anyway, there was a red halter shirt with gold trim that was originally part of an outfit worn by a Kate Jackson Charlie's Angel Barbie doll. It was just sitting on the shelf in the toy section. Separated from its owner. It looked so pretty. So perfect for my own Barbie...
As soon as my mom saw it in my hand, it was over. I was marched back into the store, made to hand it to a cashier and apologize. Obviously, this stuck with me.
According to the Hoos, when LP apologized (mostly into his shoulder), the young cashier shrugged and said thanks. I hope that a lesson was learned, because I don't want to be the one marching her back in to the store. I wonder if kids realize that events like that are just as traumatic and humiliating for a parent as for a child...
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Unbelieveable
AK idolizes her big sister. So, when LP sits on the toilet in our upstairs bathroom, AK will pull the potty up next to it and settle herself down. On occasion I will remove AK's diaper to give her the full experience. Not that she ever actually peed in the potty. Well, once she did pee next to it, does that count?
The other day she kept trying to take the potty ring and put it on top of the little potty (we have every toilet training tool you can imagine thanks to the trial and error method of toilet training we employed).
Last night as I was getting the bath ready for the girls, AK was once again nosing around the toilet. Since I already had her naked, I put the potty ring on the toilet and set her atop. She was very excited and looked like a little princess on her throne. And then I heard a plop! And a tinkle!
I called out in excitement to the Hoos and he and LP came running in. LP was exclaiming, "That is so, so great!" and clapping. AK was also grinning and clapping like crazy. She was so excited she didn't want to get off the toilet.
After things settled down the Hoos mused, "You know what that means? It means you were cutting it close. We would have had another poop in the tub."
Really? Because I thought it meant that there was the possibility that my almost 15-month old might, by some miracle, start using the toilet more regularly. But likely I am delusional. And I can't imagine they make underwear that small anyway.
Between the first time LP used the potty and her becoming fully toilet trained, it was 11 months. If AK is anywhere close we still have a long road of kowtowing at the feet of Procter and Gamble's Pampers...but a mom can hope, can't she?
The other day she kept trying to take the potty ring and put it on top of the little potty (we have every toilet training tool you can imagine thanks to the trial and error method of toilet training we employed).
Last night as I was getting the bath ready for the girls, AK was once again nosing around the toilet. Since I already had her naked, I put the potty ring on the toilet and set her atop. She was very excited and looked like a little princess on her throne. And then I heard a plop! And a tinkle!
I called out in excitement to the Hoos and he and LP came running in. LP was exclaiming, "That is so, so great!" and clapping. AK was also grinning and clapping like crazy. She was so excited she didn't want to get off the toilet.
After things settled down the Hoos mused, "You know what that means? It means you were cutting it close. We would have had another poop in the tub."
Really? Because I thought it meant that there was the possibility that my almost 15-month old might, by some miracle, start using the toilet more regularly. But likely I am delusional. And I can't imagine they make underwear that small anyway.
Between the first time LP used the potty and her becoming fully toilet trained, it was 11 months. If AK is anywhere close we still have a long road of kowtowing at the feet of Procter and Gamble's Pampers...but a mom can hope, can't she?
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Warp Speed
The other day I got the call at work that my replacement laptop has arrived. It seems that the lease on my existing one has expired. "But," I sputtered, "I got this one right after I came back from maternity leave!" With LP! THREE YEARS AGO!
Then, as I was driving in to work this morning listening to NPR, the commentator said something to the effect of, "In the three decades sine 1979..." and I did a double take. Where has the time gone? How is it possible that it has been 15 years since I graduated high school? A decade since the Y2K craziness?
It seems that in my focus on daily milestones - lunch time, quitting, dinner time, bath time, bed time - years have passed by without my noticing.
This year my oldest niece will be bat mitzvahed - I remember the Hoos getting the call from his brother with the news that his wife was pregnant! On Monday, my brother's oldest daughter started kindergarten! How is it possible that more than five years have passed since I awkwardly held her as a newborn?
Besides taking photos and trying to enjoy life as it comes, how is it possible to capture time? Ideas on how to slow down before LP is in kindergarten - or being bat mitzvahed?!
Then, as I was driving in to work this morning listening to NPR, the commentator said something to the effect of, "In the three decades sine 1979..." and I did a double take. Where has the time gone? How is it possible that it has been 15 years since I graduated high school? A decade since the Y2K craziness?
It seems that in my focus on daily milestones - lunch time, quitting, dinner time, bath time, bed time - years have passed by without my noticing.
This year my oldest niece will be bat mitzvahed - I remember the Hoos getting the call from his brother with the news that his wife was pregnant! On Monday, my brother's oldest daughter started kindergarten! How is it possible that more than five years have passed since I awkwardly held her as a newborn?
Besides taking photos and trying to enjoy life as it comes, how is it possible to capture time? Ideas on how to slow down before LP is in kindergarten - or being bat mitzvahed?!
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
My Peeps
Sometimes I look at my little girls, at the people they are becoming, and I am awed. I can't believe that I helped to create (not just bring in to the world, but to actually MAKE) these two perfect little individuals.
And I say "individuals" quite deliberately. Because even though I have two children of the same gender, from the same parents, they are quite different. Apparently the recipe is never quite the same.
When AK was born, the Hoos and I were quite surprised that she was a girl, mostly because she had dark hair. Silly, I know. But we knew what little girls that we made looked like - and they had white blond hair and lots of rolls. Not almost black hair and skinny arms and a tush the size of two thumbs!
And the surprises just keep on coming. Both of my girls are pretty outgoing, but AK is more adventurous. They both like being the center of attention, but AK is more likely to be selective in identifying the source of the attention. They both are/were good eaters as infants, but LP used to store food up in her cheeks for hours and slowly meter it out; AK scarfs down food as quickly as she can shovel it in.
Since they are both so young (three and one respectively, natch) I can't say I have their personalities all figured out. But I do continue to be amazed that not only are they different from one another but they are not even necessarily like me or the Hoos. I actively look for clues, asking my parents if I talked incessantly like LP (I did) or looking at baby pictures of the Hoos and seeing both LP's rolls (yes, really! for those of you that know the Hoos) and AK's curls.
I know that as a parent I will never have my children all figured out, but I do think I am starting to get a better handle on my parents. To think that they looked at me with stars in their eyes the way I look at my angels?! And that on some days they were also tired and struggling to not beat me and my brother down?! As Mr. Slinger, in Lilly's Purple Plastic Purse would say: Wow. Just wow.
And I say "individuals" quite deliberately. Because even though I have two children of the same gender, from the same parents, they are quite different. Apparently the recipe is never quite the same.
When AK was born, the Hoos and I were quite surprised that she was a girl, mostly because she had dark hair. Silly, I know. But we knew what little girls that we made looked like - and they had white blond hair and lots of rolls. Not almost black hair and skinny arms and a tush the size of two thumbs!
And the surprises just keep on coming. Both of my girls are pretty outgoing, but AK is more adventurous. They both like being the center of attention, but AK is more likely to be selective in identifying the source of the attention. They both are/were good eaters as infants, but LP used to store food up in her cheeks for hours and slowly meter it out; AK scarfs down food as quickly as she can shovel it in.
Since they are both so young (three and one respectively, natch) I can't say I have their personalities all figured out. But I do continue to be amazed that not only are they different from one another but they are not even necessarily like me or the Hoos. I actively look for clues, asking my parents if I talked incessantly like LP (I did) or looking at baby pictures of the Hoos and seeing both LP's rolls (yes, really! for those of you that know the Hoos) and AK's curls.
I know that as a parent I will never have my children all figured out, but I do think I am starting to get a better handle on my parents. To think that they looked at me with stars in their eyes the way I look at my angels?! And that on some days they were also tired and struggling to not beat me and my brother down?! As Mr. Slinger, in Lilly's Purple Plastic Purse would say: Wow. Just wow.
Monday, August 17, 2009
All By Myself
Yay! The weekend is over! The Hoos is back! If I never have to hear, "That isn't how Daddy's does it!" again, it will be too soon.
I did have a great time with the girls. Yes, it was nice not to have to worry about being home at a certain time or preparing dinner, but I definitely could have used more sleep and about four more showers a day (warm temperatures + clingy kids = stinky mommy).
Friday afternoon I kept the girls out of the house for as long as possible. We spent two hours on the playground (sweating profusely) and another forty minutes at Stew's. That left me with only about an hour and a half until bedtime.
Saturday we spent the morning and early afternoon with some friends at a farmer's market and playground. My plan was to run them around so they would fall asleep in the car on the way home. It was a lot of fun in the sun and it certainly wore me out. Alas, four hours in the sun is not enough for the other female members of the family and neither LP nor AK took a nap. I was literally counting down the hours until bedtime. Which couldn't come soon enough and which took way too long. Both of my over-exhausted munchkins were giggling fools. Running in and out of their bedrooms, jumping on each other and having a grand old time.
Sunday was a family brunch with the Hoos' family. He wasn't there most of the time, but at least I was not alone to entertain my children. I can usually count on my nieces to watch them. Unfortunately, my nieces are children too and at one point they were otherwise entertained (understandably). I was so bummed that I - GASP! - had to watch my own children.
I am very happy that the Hoos is home. Not only is he smart, cute, and my best friend - he is a great dad. Which reminds me of why I married him seven years ago today.
I did have a great time with the girls. Yes, it was nice not to have to worry about being home at a certain time or preparing dinner, but I definitely could have used more sleep and about four more showers a day (warm temperatures + clingy kids = stinky mommy).
Friday afternoon I kept the girls out of the house for as long as possible. We spent two hours on the playground (sweating profusely) and another forty minutes at Stew's. That left me with only about an hour and a half until bedtime.
Saturday we spent the morning and early afternoon with some friends at a farmer's market and playground. My plan was to run them around so they would fall asleep in the car on the way home. It was a lot of fun in the sun and it certainly wore me out. Alas, four hours in the sun is not enough for the other female members of the family and neither LP nor AK took a nap. I was literally counting down the hours until bedtime. Which couldn't come soon enough and which took way too long. Both of my over-exhausted munchkins were giggling fools. Running in and out of their bedrooms, jumping on each other and having a grand old time.
Sunday was a family brunch with the Hoos' family. He wasn't there most of the time, but at least I was not alone to entertain my children. I can usually count on my nieces to watch them. Unfortunately, my nieces are children too and at one point they were otherwise entertained (understandably). I was so bummed that I - GASP! - had to watch my own children.
I am very happy that the Hoos is home. Not only is he smart, cute, and my best friend - he is a great dad. Which reminds me of why I married him seven years ago today.
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